為何要見靈修指導？
為了「屬靈照鏡」，為了看見自己屬靈真正的樣貌，更為了真正可以聽到神的聲音。
你有想過要見靈修指導嗎？至少我從沒想過。不過，也許你也與我一樣曾見過輔導。為了某些原因、為了保護人與事，選擇了見輔導，希望重返正軌，甚至找到正軌。
甚麼時候「生病了」變得羞恥？
仔細想來，不應該視見輔導為「有問題」吧，人生病了而求醫豈不正常不過嗎？只看過人無錢而不得醫治，恐怕沒有因病求診而被責罵吧？卻有人貼標籤於輔導，把求見者視為有問題、可恥，更甚者是求診者自己也如此標籤自己。可惜，也太難受了。
太多人忽略了必須醫治心靈，畢竟學校從不列入科目內。學校是教人得到工具（學科知識），甚至成為工具（知識專業人士、勞動技術工人），以便被社會、被僱主利用；社會卻在人心靈受傷時沒有主動提供治療，最多只會醫治你的病驅。為甚麼呢？因為人病了，不能工作為僱主盈利，「修復了人這台機器」才可以繼續生產利潤。可惜的是，社會沒有從法律規範僱主關注並醫治僱員心靈健康，所以僱主沒有義務及責任。遺憾社會同樣沒有規範自己必須有責任為僱員及弱勢社群提供醫治心靈服務，換言之即是你與我「好自為之」。
以上是整個人類社會的其中一面，說起來有點悲哀。也許有些社會發達國家如歐洲，也許會有一些福利關於心靈醫治？我不肯定，但我們東亞國家的社會確實不重視，在香港的政府支援也相當貧乏。是有但相當貧乏，因為條件是你要夠窮，否則已得不到政府支援，面對那額外開支，加上可能自己也不願承認自己有問題。結果又有多少人願意去醫治自己的心靈呢？
本來已輕視醫治心靈，何況醫治屬靈生命呢？
想到這裏，你有沒有感覺到神的美善呢？創造第七天神自己看創造為好也安息，之後立下安息日要叫人安息。神待人很好，不是嗎？神是個靈，沒有肉身而不會累，尚且自己也作榜樣去安息，何況神體諒人的需要，為人設安息日呢？神不會要人工作至身疲力竭才醫治人，甚至不像人間社會一樣，見人病入膏肓而無可救藥，便捨棄而換人。上帝視人為生命，要珍惜，因此醫治人的身與心。所以才有詩篇46篇「你們要休息，要知道我是神」去幫助人並提醒人。請你不要太勉強自己，願你也放過自己吧。一同去尋找神，連結主來得醫治。
我們都曾生病，身體與心靈都曾生病，身體也許得醫治了，但不等於我們都曾經醫治了心病，更可能輕忽了屬靈生命了。我見靈修指導的目的之一正是為了醫治心靈，另一原因就是為了與神連結並聽神說話了。
祈禱向神講，靈修聽神講
不知道你是否相當重視祈禱與靈修呢？如果是，恭喜你！我曾以為自己知道甚麼是靈修，但經過教會傳道教師介紹去見靈修指導導後，發現了自己的謬誤。我的錯謬在於誤把讀經當靈修，你呢？我過往的祈禱很重視說話，卻忘了雅各書經文：「人人都應該快快地聽，慢慢地說，慢慢地動怒」。有我講無神講不正正是問題嗎？聽神講才是最重要，唯有真心相信在神裏有正確答案，可聽到神心意，才會真正重視神的話。相信你也見過迷信星座與占卜之人，他們比起一般信徒更專心聆聽，因為他們恐怕聽漏了重要訊息。可惜我們都容易犯錯，輕忽了神說話才是最重要，我們只要聽就好了。
不要怕這樣安靜、專心想尋求神的回應，會變成走火入魔、錯誤與邪靈接觸。只要我們專心靠神，先為此祈禱而求主保守，不要一心追求所謂超自然體驗，加上整個過程也思想聖經中神的話，我相信神必保守我們不致跌倒。過程中用心等候並感受神的回應，讓神作主而不是自己控制過程。這也是順服之一。
換言之，甚麼是見靈修指導呢？
個人經驗而言，是你向神尋求、求問，過程中向神祈禱並思想經文後，你把過程中的感受、得着並你相信是神的回應告知靈修指導員，然後聆聽靈修指導員給予的回應、提醒及建議。情況與個人見輔導有點相似，重點不同在於靈修指導由此至終也是建立你自己與神的連繫，答案與醫治也來自神而不是人。
過程中也許會發現自己以往對屬靈思想、祈禱甚至對神的認識有錯誤、或偏頗、或更新、或進深。請你也一同面對並走過去，因為我們的屬靈生命會得神更新、憂傷的靈神必不輕看，也必醫治。
其實不必把靈修指導想得很遙遠，平常與牧師及傳道教師傾談屬靈的內容，並得到回應與建議，其實也有靈修指導的部分內容。相比而言，靈修指導更像輔導，過程中有目的明確、更重視認識神並認識屬靈層面的自己（當然與現實生活的自己不可分割）、並重視自己直接從神得到回應。
如果你感到陌生實在正常，我起初也是如此。願你一同祈禱，求主幫助我們，因為真真正正指導靈修的是神，深信神必領我們走義路。
Why do I need to see a spiritual director?
For the “spiritual mirroring”, to see the true face of my spirit, and to really hear the voice of God.
Have you ever thought about seeing a spiritual director? At least I have never thought about it. But maybe you have seen a counselor as well. For some reason, to protect people and things, you have chosen to see a counselor, hoping to get back on track, or even find it.
When does “being sick” become a shame?
When you think about it, you should not see counseling as a “problem”. Isn’t it normal for people to seek medical help when they are sick? I’ve only seen people who have no money and are unable to get medical treatment, but I believe that no one has never been scolded for seeking medical treatment. But there are people who label counseling as problematic and shameful, and even worse, people who seek treatment label themselves like that. Unfortunately, it is very sad to hear that.
Too many people overlook the need to heal the mind, which after all is never part of the curriculum in school. Schools teach people to acquire tools (subject knowledge) and even become tools (to become professionals or skilled laborers) in order to be used by society and employers, while society does not take the initiative to provide treatment when the mind is wounded, and at best will only treat your body. Why? Because people are sick and can’t work to make profit for employers. Unfortunately, society does not legally regulate employers to care for and treat the mental health of employees, so employers have no obligation and responsibility. Regrettably, society also does not regulate its own responsibility to provide mental health services to employees and the disadvantaged, in other words, you and I are “on our own”.
This is one of the aspects of human society that is sad to say. Perhaps some developed countries like Europe might have some benefits for spiritual healing? I am not sure, but it is true that our society in East Asian countries does not pay much attention to it, and the government support in Hong Kong is quite poor. Yes, we have it but it is quite poor, because the condition is that you must be poor enough, otherwise you can’t get government support, and you may not want to admit that you have a problem and to burden the extra expenses. As a result, how many people are willing to heal their own hearts and souls?
We already despise healing the heart, let alone healing spiritual life.
Thinking about this, have you ever felt the goodness of God? On the seventh day of creation God Himself saw the creation as good and rested, and then He made the Sabbath day to give rest to man. God is very good to people, isn’t He? God is a spirit and does not have a physical body and does not get tired, but he himself sets the example of rest, not to mention that God understands the needs of man and sets the Sabbath for him. God does not ask people to work until they are exhausted before healing them, or even abandon them for others when they are terminally ill and beyond remedy, as in human society. God sees man as a living being and cherishes him, so he heals him physically and mentally. That is why Psalm 46, “Rest, and know that I am God,” was written to help people and remind them. Please don’t push yourself too hard, may you also let yourself go. Go to God together and connect to the Lord for healing.
We have all been sick, both physically and spiritually, and we may have been healed physically, but that does not mean we have been healed spiritually, and we may have neglected our spiritual lives. I see that one of the purposes of spiritual direction is to heal the heart, and the other reason is to connect with God and hear from Him.
Prayer speaks to God, spirituality listens to God
I wonder if you take prayer and spirituality seriously? If so, congratulations! I thought I knew what spirituality was, but after being referred to a spiritual director by my church pastor, I discovered my mistake. My mistake was that I mistook Bible study for spirituality connection to God. I used to put a lot of emphasis on speaking in my prayers, but I forgot the verse in James: “Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger.” Is it not a question of whether God speaks to me or not? The only way to truly value God’s word is to truly believe that God has the right answer and to hear His heart. I’m sure you’ve seen people who are superstitious about horoscopes and divination, and they listen more intently than ordinary believers because they are afraid of missing important information. Unfortunately, we are all prone to make the mistake of neglecting the fact that God’s word is the most important thing, and that we just need to listen.
Don’t be afraid that such a quiet, focused desire to seek God’s response will lead to wrong contact with evil spirits. As long as we focus on God, pray for this first and ask the Lord to keep us from pursuing the so-called supernatural experience, and think about God’s words in the Bible throughout the process, I believe God will keep us from falling. We wait and feel God’s response during the process, and let God be the master instead of controlling the process ourselves. This is also part of obedience.
In other words, what is seeing a spiritual director?
In my personal experience, it is when you seek and ask God, pray to God and think about the scriptures during the process, then you tell the spiritual director how you feel, what you have gained and what you believe to be God’s response, and then you listen to the spiritual director’s response, reminders and suggestions. The situation is somewhat similar to personal counseling, but the key difference is that the spiritual director is ultimately building your own connection to God, and the answers and healing come from God, not man.
During the process, you may find that your past knowledge of spiritual thinking, prayer, and even God is wrong, biased, renewed, or deepened. Please face and walk through this together, for our spiritual lives will be renewed by God, and the sorrowful spirit will not despised and will be healed.
You don’t have to think of spiritual direction as far-fetched. Talking to pastors and preachers about spiritual matters and getting feedback and advice is part of spiritual direction. In contrast, spiritual direction is more like counseling in that it is purposeful, places more emphasis on knowing God and knowing oneself on a spiritual level (inseparable from one’s real-life self, of course), and places an emphasis on receiving responses directly from God.
If this is strange to you, it’s normal, and it was to me at first. May you pray together that the Lord will help us, for it is God who truly guides spirituality, confident that He will lead us in the path of righteousness.